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Archive for the ‘On A Lighter Note’ Category

“Working elite folks like us”

Posted by theonlinecitizen on April 18, 2007

The following is a video on the recent ministers’ pay hike. It is recommended to theonlinecitizen by a reader. It’s rather humourous. Take a look:

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Just for laughs…

Posted by theonlinecitizen on March 22, 2007

Just thought I’d share this with everyone – for a laugh. Or are our kids too stressed too?

From Wind In My Head blog.

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Posted in Education, On A Lighter Note | 3 Comments »

Hip-hopping MPs

Posted by theonlinecitizen on February 1, 2007

By The Kentang

Analysts say that the PAP’s embrace of Hip-Hop, in order to nudge towards a style of government more in tune with the local populace, is not a surprising move, despite being met by disbelief, satire, and outright laughter by Singaporeans. The Kentang interviewed several intellectuals who have managed, so far, to avoid defamation suits.

“When you think about it, it is almost to be expected,” says Professor Contraband Chan, currently a successful wet market pork merchant after resigning from her position as head of NUS’s department of Political Horticulture. “Today’s young Singaporeans like to see their minstrels in action, really getting down into the street and providing entertainment for the general populace.”

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How Many Ministers Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?

Posted by theonlinecitizen on January 10, 2007

The PAP recently held a closed door, secret meeting to discuss the issue of lightbulbs in Singapore. Below is the transcript of the meeting which was leaked out.

Lee Hsien Loong: Gentlemen and ladies… I am very happy to announce that 66.6% of the people want to buy our new Progress Lightbulbs, according to our nationwide survey in May. It is a very strong signal to us.

Denise Phua: But sir, something is wrong. I know that something has gone wrong when more than 85 per cent (of the traffic on the internet) writes negatively about the lightbulbs. This is something that the PAP would do well to take into account … and to manage this channel of communication.

LHL: But Denise, already some people are afraid to speak up for fear of saying the wrong thing, or being taken to task. But for debate to be fruitful, it has to be rigorous and not held back out of concern for egos and sensitivities

Lee Boon Yang: You mean like that Mr Brown fella?

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“Durai Saga” fan fiction competition launched

Posted by theonlinecitizen on January 10, 2007

By The Kentang

“Patter”, an online web portal affiliated to The Straits Times, has launched a “Durai Saga” fan fiction competition. According to Patter’s deputy editor, Mr Kimberly Faucet Chua, the competition will “allow Singaporeans to actively participate in citizen journalism and thereby feel more closely bonded to their nation.”

Participants in the competition write a fan fiction story based on the current Durai Saga, placing its anti-hero, former NKF chief executive T.T. Durai, in various fantasy situations that take place in an alternate universe that comes to an end with his trial.

Responses have been overwhelming, though many Singaporeans display an expected lack of imagination. “We already have 300 entries titled some variant of ‘T.T. Durai and the Golden Faucet of Fire'”, claims Mr Chua.

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Singaporean students to be re-valued monthly

Posted by theonlinecitizen on December 29, 2006

school-2.jpgBy The Kentang

Singapore students will now be ranked according to their monetary value each month

Keeping in line with Singapore‘s goal to extract maximum value from every Singaporean Student, the Ministry of Emulation has drafted a new scheme that is remarkable for its innovativeness in the number of buzzwords it manages to employ. The Kentang interviewed Mr. Vivobioluptous Hopkins Fan, Chief Executive Officer of the Ministry of Emulation.

“Basically, we have to value our students in a new way, one that is free from colonial concepts such as ‘marks’ and grades’; a mindset that will better address our multi-cultural, Asian-valued, Uniquely Singaporean paradigm while still allowing us access to the developing global economy,” began Mr. Fan.

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Give a simple gift this christmas

Posted by theonlinecitizen on December 24, 2006

homeless.jpgAs we celebrate Christmas – the time of peace, love and giving – let us spare a thought for the less fortunate in our society and in our world.

Lets take it upon ourselves to say a nice word, express a smile or even give a simple gift to those around us who are less fortunate – the poor, homeless, sick, depressed, lonely.

Let this Christmas be the one where we all give a little bit more of ourselves.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Regards,

theonlinecitizen

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